diff --git a/packages/server/src/db/linkedRows/LinkController.js b/packages/server/src/db/linkedRows/LinkController.js
index a5404709f2..2e86592b24 100644
--- a/packages/server/src/db/linkedRows/LinkController.js
+++ b/packages/server/src/db/linkedRows/LinkController.js
@@ -183,12 +183,14 @@ class LinkController {
         // iterate through the link IDs in the row field, see if any don't exist already
         for (let linkId of rowField) {
           if (linkedSchema.relationshipType === RelationshipTypes.ONE_TO_MANY) {
-            const links = await getLinkDocuments({
-              appId: this._appId,
-              tableId: field.tableId,
-              rowId: linkId,
-              includeDocs: IncludeDocs.INCLUDE,
-            })
+            const links = (
+              await getLinkDocuments({
+                appId: this._appId,
+                tableId: field.tableId,
+                rowId: linkId,
+                includeDocs: IncludeDocs.EXCLUDE,
+              })
+            ).filter(link => link.id !== row._id)
 
             // The 1 side of 1:N is already related to something else
             // You must remove the existing relationship
@@ -330,12 +332,7 @@ class LinkController {
         if (field.relationshipType) {
           // Ensure that the other side of the relationship is locked to one record
           linkConfig.relationshipType = field.relationshipType
-
-          // Update this table to be the many
-          table.schema[field.name].relationshipType =
-            RelationshipTypes.MANY_TO_MANY
-          const response = await this._db.put(table)
-          table._rev = response.rev
+          delete field.relationshipType
         }
 
         // check the linked table to make sure we aren't overwriting an existing column